These Balls Aren't going to suck themselves, BOBA TEA SHIRT Unisex organic mid-light t-shirt

🎤 Mic check, one, two… Are you ready to serve piping-hot laughs with a side of creamy bubble tea goodness? This shirt doesn’t just make a statement—it delivers a spicy mic-drop moment.

Slide into the "These Balls Aren't Going to Suck Themselves" Unisex Organic Tee and watch as you turn heads faster than a boba straw hitting that tapioca jackpot. Whether you’re a die-hard boba enthusiast or just here for the innuendos, this shirt guarantees your humor (and your balls) stay front and center.

Features that Feel Like a Hug but Sassier:
🍃 100% Organic Cotton: Because your tea’s already artificial enough—keep your fabric real.
👕 Regular Fit: Loose enough for slurping freedom but snug enough to show off your tea-loving assets.
🧵 Durable Design: Set-in sleeves, double-needle hems, and collar ribbing keep you stylish sip after sip.
🎯 Unisex Vibes: Perfect for anyone bold enough to say what everyone’s thinking.

Why You Need It:
For the boba-lovers who know the real joy of popping pearls and spicy puns.

For the pun-masters who want to make strangers choke (on laughter, obviously).

For anyone who dares to live life with flavor, sexy, and a little extra suction power.

Stop scrolling, grab this shirt, and let your chest do the talking. Because these balls really aren’t going to suck themselves.

Warning: May cause uncontrollable laughter, flirtatious conversations, and boba cravings. Drink responsibly.


• 100% organic combed ring-spun cotton
• Fabric weight: 4.6 oz./yd.² (155 g/m²)
• Regular fit
• Set-in sleeves
• 1 × 1 rib at collar
• Double-needle topstitch on the sleeves and bottom hems
• Self-fabric neck tape on the inside of the back
• The fabric of this product is certified by GOTS (Global Organic Textile Standard), GRS (Global Recycled Standard), and OCS (Organic Content Standard)
• Blank product sourced from Bangladesh

Please note that all of our items are made to order, so it typically takes at least 2 days for handling. After that, your order will be shipped on the 3rd day. Once shipped, it’s in the hands of the post office for delivery. We take extra care in creating each product just for you, which is why it may take a bit longer to reach you. By making products on demand rather than in bulk, we help reduce overproduction, so we truly appreciate your thoughtful purchasing decision!

Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years

In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Attire T LLC and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com. You can also write to us at Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.

Size guide